Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Daylight Bravado!

It is usually the Rectus abdominus muscle which is damaged in an abdominal strain I have heard, and just as you are winding down your abdominal rehabilitation from laughing SO long and hard at my frequently "on-the-money" blogs, it's time for another one....

But this time my puddings, its different. For this this here blog THIS time is a.... (drum roll - pun intended)....MUSIC REVIEW. 

(NBA Jam Sega Megadrive)

Close friends and long time legends turned adelaide-music-scene-juggernauts The DAYLIGHT BRAVES have recently released a swag of catchy psych-rock numbers on their debut EP, Liquid Sun. The lads laid the choons down care-of Adelaide Guru Matt Hills, after doing an admirable dash around the Adelaide circuit, a trio of Melbourne gigs, and a banger at Sydney's infamous World Bar.

I have always had a solid for these boys, they are always on the same humour page in the awesome book - they play their instruments like fucking Vikings and they have a cunning and unique brand of music which I would pay/get-on the-list for any damn day. In fact I have been so enthused by these plonkers in the past that I have put my hand up to do their lights on several occasions - which was no doubt a contributing factor to their more than decent Graybags Spoz Spozzington reviews in the past. Don't mention it. They can thank me in vodka-pineapples at another juncture (with one of those teeny tiny umbrellas). 

Liquid Sun highlights include the swirling and uplifting guitars of Summer At Last, which caught the lobes of Dom Alessio and harkens to the likes of Cream or Tame Impala, but with a daylight braves stamp all over it, rolling basslines, clever drum beats and angelic harmonies. Shits tight. Solemn boy also bleeds musical maturity with the implementation of shakers, and a relaxed vibe that makes you wanna binge on acid and marry-jew-ana, and plough your face into a mound of incense or something. But for me, my BFF comes in the form of the darker "Absent Ground". Its pulsating, it's badass, its catchy and it  goes Anders Brievek live. I have showed it to a few older fellas at work who pop it in the "Doors" category - which is a huge compliment coming from those older closet music lovers who seem to know everything about everything, and some. This tune is FETCH (yeah I like Mean Girls - back Up). It has an almost demonic undercurrent driven by the pulsating, monotonous bass lines of Tom Sizzler Stevens, something reminiscent of The Arctic Monkeys' Nick O'Malley - with a clever bridge, and haunting double tracked vocals from Dan Beacom - and a guitar solo that will leave your faced screwed up like a fart you cant quite squeeze out yet. I'm a fan, not as in an oscillating three-pronged propeller next to my bed in summer, as in a dude who reckons these tunes are the NUTSACK. Get on it, download their tunes and play them in summer, at dusk - whilst staring at the clouds for the perfect experience. Liquid Sun. Tally Mi Bananas? 4/5 bananas.

One banana was subtracted because I want more Absent Groundism, more poo-faces, and less surfs up. Although their surf song is Dang catchy. That's Just Buns I guess. And he aint no poop eater. Ya Hear? Kay.


Stay tunes for TDB's review of our new single. I know, the suspense is killing you. Apologies. 


Catch TSB's and TDB's at The K.I Surf and Music Fest November 3-5 at Vivonne Bay. Don't be a bender and get a ticket.



Sunday, October 16, 2011

My Milkshake brings all the god damn chicks to the yard.

I fought with myself over typing that, my ethnic side got the better of me. Even though I have no ethnic ancestry.... but I do like feta cheese. I legitimately heard a guy say this at the 24 hour K-food express on Saturday night,  he had bumbling biceps with veins like fire-hoses. He was intimidating.

OK? Good Start. Great Start.

I know you are all wicked jealous of my witty banta, on Friday at work a colleague threw me a stress ball, that was shaped like a choo-choo train - but was by all accounts too firm to be used to actually reduce stress? Which begs the question - what is it then? To the untrained comedic mind - it was a dead end conversation. But for the veteran cogs of  pun geniuses - it was quite the opposite. For example, I turned to my pal Dan at work whilst squeezing the train like a beating heart and said......"Hey Dan, I'm TRAINING"...Bang. I mean, that is just effing classy. To his very well-earned credit he responded swiftly, offering "Not a bad effort - you were on the right track..." This pun ping-pong went on for the best part of half an hour. Notable contributions included "you would be steaming..." and "careful you might get a COAL-SORE"... I know right? Tremendous.

This game soon moved onto something requiring much more intellectual integrity. We have all played it in our junior years at some-point, and it is one of the few games that can earn you the badge of being a "Real Man". Its where you sit about 1.5 metres from the person opposite you (this is in an office where you can hear a mouse fart) and one of the two participants is required to withstand a pelted stress ball in the FACE. For some reason, I can guarantee you will be giggling like a girl scout. Its sparks the sort of laughter that results in tears. Like, do you know how hard it is to tense your face?? with impending danger? It makes you look absolutely ridiculous. Like Sylvester Stallone after he just smelt a fart, whilst sucking on a lemon in glaring sunlight or some shet. It is honestly one of the funniest things you can do with five minutes and an opponent. You will thank me. See?? This blog is different. It's a pioneer. We give, you take. It's like a cooking recipe website - but more bad-ass and fucking sweet.

These sort of shenanigans filled my weekend. Like on Saturday night whilst we were out at a licensed establishment, and we chose to play "quadruple points A to Z"..... Yeah, we know how to party. Its simple, you just go around the circle and say four words in a row, starting with the same letter, and attempt to offer a sentence that actually makes grammatical sense. Forget chatting to babes and jamming jager bombs - this is what the new wave of legends are up to. Answers like "Desperate Donkey's Do Dominos" were thrown out there - at which point the player promptly offers an argument as to Why this sentence is acceptable. "They do. They do do dominos - I've bloody seen them do it at the zoo" sort of thing. The more cider they consume, the more adamant they become that each others quadruple-A-to-Z answer is the best/worst/worthy. The game ticks every box..... Thanks Buns, no worries my students.

Until next time. Take care of yourselves..... aaaaaaaand each other.


Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Blinded By The Lights

To aid the previous blog, here is some exciting scenes from The Streets on Monday. Geezers.

Many Happy Returns.


Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Farklife and other exciting features...

Roses are Red, violets are blue
Long weekend turns me to poo-poo...
The End.

It’s been a while – keeping well? YEAH I wanna sit down.

The weekend has vanished in a cesspool of elbow sprinklers, southern cross tattoos, footy-footy-footy and debilitating injuries. It’s OK, I will explain.

Them Ahhhh Shiny Brights played on Friday night with long-time RADelaide indie Vikings – CITY RIOTS. With the two of our bands repping busy interstate schedules of recent, coupled with A Shinys hiatus, it has been many moons since we have actually had the pleasure of playing along-side these boys – who were also supported by Adelaide’s Lyla. Not heaps has changed since we played with them first-up at Jive – They have gotten bigger, they are still tight-like-tiger, and are still gnarly human beings. I even let out a high-pitched “oh my goooood”, like Kim Duthie might, when they broke into Match sticks/She never wants to Dance. Always been a fan. Good guys. Good tunes. Great Band. Strong Cocks.

We also had the opportunity on this evening to ignite our long-weekend binges – which I was excited about, but the bouncer at Sugar wasn’t.... Cool.

Sat-Dee saw the injection of sport into the weekend which set the arm-bending pace. Hours later Regos back fence was on fire, Chris was wearing a corporate telephone headset whilst giving a haircut and rego was growing increasingly angry at those hiking style/casual shoes that he had spotted.  I was busy bringing the rain – having a swell time shooting hoops. And by that I mean Basketball – not men’s bums. OK?

How does a serial killer come into this story? This is how....

...I know, great read hey?

The wee hours of Sunday morning had me at Jive. Checked in – accompanied by 60 chunes. I made a trip to the bar for a daiquiri..I mean beer. It was here that my pants were moistened by the site of SNOWTOWN lead actor Lucas Pittaway AKA four-time first degree murder convicted Jamie Vlassakis. Here my night took a turn, my focus shifted from long-arming to following this sweet actor around Jive. His hair was slicked back into a mane. YEAH. As if to say “Yeah, it’s me”. I couldn’t take my eyes of him. He busted me looking at him like fifty times. But Fuck him – it’s not my fault he plays a serial killer really well.  He was actually palming off woman. I know how that is! Am I right? So fly. Lucas opted for a woman in the end, fair enough I guess. His loss though.

Farklife was on Monday. I was already at the Post Office in struggle Town too. It took all my cahonies to muster enough Morale to see the day out. But I did, because I am a fucking Ledge. Top acts/suprise packets for the day included DFA 1979, The Streets, Crystal Fighters and Little Dragon. Impressive to say the least – even when in some instances it wasn’t expected.

But what was expected was the countless arse-clowns with their shirts off. Full time flexers with Carpe Diem tats and enormous Prada sunnies. Painful – but at least they weren’t at the acts which actually had people playing instruments. If they were, they were lost. Which was funny. A girl also seemed to have broken her neck – this backs my earlier claim of serious injury. Apparently she nailed her head coming down from a crowd surf. But nobody knows what actually happened. But the chinese whispers were also amusing. I also saw our mate руководишь from one of our previous blogs there. I walked 100 metres right angles across to avoid a beat down.

Thanks for your readership.


Jump on here to download our new tune too - a FRESHER one will be up very, very soon.