Example number ONE:
It all began about six months ago, Milesy had been at his new place of employment for only a week or so. I work on the second floor of a building yeah? Which means we have an elevator yes? One that is big enough for say....two or three burley men. Anyhoo Bottom line is, awkward. Or if your into new school slang “awkers”.
So I am that fresh faced dude around the office that people don’t quite know yet from a bar of soap, or a tea towel....But nonetheless, me and the other employees roll past each other in the office, squat slightly, point at each other and go “eeeeyyy Budddyy, my maaaan” etc. Like some fiendish nod to the Phons, who I never ever watch/watched – but still mimic anyway, in a desperate attempt to connect with my older colleagues. So shit. So this one particular day I knock off and pop into the lift.....with this chic...who isn’t too bad on the eye....
We kick things off in the lift with utter silence, and only the odd squeek from the elevator shaft. She is looking at her feet, so am I. I’m thinking – this must be the worlds slowest lift, please hurry. I’m begging you....elevator...man.. So I glance over and notice she is holding two bananas (I will remind you at this point that this is 100% true) after careful thought, I offer.......”Ah. Double Banana”..
WHAT.THE.FUCK.IS.THAT
Double Banana?!? For fucks sake. I had to stand there for another 30 seconds??? In silence, after the most absurd sentence I’ve maybe ever said. You could have cut the awkwardness with a butter knife. So now this bird thinks I’m some retarded maniac, and I run into her nearly everyday. She avoids me. I would too?? So I told my mate Dan at work about the incident, sometimes he draws two bananas on my diary. Perfect example of Strange Talk.
Here is also a strange picture to aid this blog...
Example Number 2:
A friend at work took this last week.
It reads "Please keep of the lawn until it is established, say - may 13th??" seems good to me bro.
Awesome.
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